So, motherhood is amazing right? Well, most days. Other days it is like going to war. Not just war but, a losing battle with minefields everywhere. These are the days honest mothers will admit freely and without fear if admonishment..."screw this, I quit". Today was one of those glorious days.
At every turn I found myself wishing for an incurable bout of leperosy that would leave me in a confined hospital room with no visitors. I even found myself googling "non violent crimes with 2 year prison term" followed by a quick Google of "how to get solitary confinement while imprisoned". Yup, it was that kind of day.
Most "Martha" moms won't admit to feeling this sense of utter failure but, I have no trouble admitting defeat. Why? Because inevitably on one of these God forsaken days, He will send me a sign. Now, I am not crazy (seriously, I am not) but I do often times find God in moments...moments of pure, divine grace. A moment that you know is just for you. This rant isabout that moment.
I won't bore you with the mundane details of wretchedness but I will share the moment. At approximately 6pm as dinner was burning, I had called my five children to the table for the 50th time and was just ready to let loose a screaming rampage on my first victim...the door opened. In walks sweet, adorable, covered in mud Keegan. By this point my face was red and I swear I could feel my hair roots catching on fire. I opened my mouth to say something dreadful when he says, "here mommy. I picked these flowers for uyou". Now, when I tell you they were the rattiest weeds on the face of the planet, I kid you not. But, to me they were a bouquet of awesome love given by my child from him and God. In that moment I swear I heard God say, "right on chick. I dig your dish. It is ok. Breathe".
I picked up Keego, gave him the biggest kiss ever and looked into his eyes to tell him thank you sweet boy of mine. I put those raggeddy ol weeds on my table next to my prayer stones where they will stay everyday forever. So, you see, this was my moment of incredible clarity and joy that turned this day into a beautiful one.