Monday, September 26, 2011

Sick and Twisted Social Media

Let the wild rumpus start...
This weekend we hung out with our 2 oldest and their friends. I was seriously worried after we had some straight forward discussions on movies and music that they partake in. A 7 th grader informed us that he has watched all of the saw movies. Now, I am one of those crazy horror movie fans but, really?! That movie is not suitable for me let alone a kid! Another girl talked about her undying love and admiration for lady Gaga and nicks minaj. I looked up some of their music and was shocked by the lyrics.

The thing that kills me is that for our little girls we are setting up an environment to desensitize us to a society filled with men who believe women only want one thing. But, the thing is I want my daughter to be looked at and treated more powerfully than that. I want men and women alike to respect her. I want her to be able to hold her own in a room of all ages without judgement. I want her to always think of others before herself. I want her to have role models that don't feel the need to dress up in bologna to make a point. Or to wear trashy clothes to prove she's not just an object.

The other thing that bothers me is our future men that will become fathers and husbands. I want my son to look up to women and value them in a way that he does not value his friends. I want him to be able to walk down the street without getting turned on by every girl who dresses in sexy clothing way too old for her age. I want him to look up to men who are creative and kind not sadistic and twisted. I want my son to find entertainment in good things not violence and anger.

The conversations this weekend made me conclude 2 things. One, i will continue to make relationships with all of my children's friends. This way I can know who is influencing them when I am not there. Two, I have to stick to my guns even if the world isn't. All the while trying to make my kids have an active role in the decision making process. So, hopefully one day, whether I am there or not, they will make the right decision for the right reason. Then and only then will I know I have succeeded.

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Listen To Your Heart

Lately I have been trying to pray and ask God to show me the right path to take. There are moments when you hit a crossroads and you have to decide which road to take. You always have a gut feeling. It's the first thought you have and the one you are called to. But, what do you do when that road is full of obstacles and all the travel guides are pointing in the opposite direction?

You pray. You give it up to God. You take a leap of faith and push yourself on. You can't go on without having faith. It's the power that pushes you and pulls you forward. Prayers are the fuel. Living this way has always been my motto. For goodness sakes, The Road Less Traveled is one of my all time favorite poems. Carpet Diem is the 2 words that mean the most. Why is it I still worry?

I know the path will be rocky and uncleared but, today I wish for a crystal ball to see the future. Will all the stumbling blocks be worth it? Is my motivation correct? Is this road going to where God wants me to go? To the last question there is no hesitation. It is yes. I know it. I know it in my bones. I have known it from the start. So, the other answers don't matter. Ultimately we have to walk forward in faith.

And, so I will walk forward with my husband by my side into an unknown path. We lead our children and we will have to lead confidently. If we lead strongly they will follow and not falter. Right now, I hear JP2..."Don't Be Afraid". I ask for prayers that I will have faith... I just had an aha moment! I have been so worried about what to pray for... I will pray to be faithful and trusting in God to lead me! Join me in this prayer. I feel very peaceful as I say good night.

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

The Wonderful World of High/Low

On our best days we manage to sit down as a family and eat. Dinner is usually met with squabbles, manner issues, spilled milk and complaints from my young aspiring food critics. But, once in a blue mood there is a moment of calm and I sit at our table and reflect on my blessings. Now, mind you, this lasts but a minute and that minute is glorious.

In that moment inevitably the game of high/low comes up. One of my all time favorite movies is The Story of Us and the dinner table scene is epic. Because even though their lives might be crumbling, that game reminds them of what matters. So, we have tried to begin this very special game into our family.

Here's the premise... each person tells a "high" from their day and also a "low". The highs are my favorite and the lows are sad but offer valuable missed information from your children. Sometimes, it offers a snapshot of a child that needs attention or that is struggling with a friend at school. Sometimes there isn't any low and that is a joyful moment.

Today the game was played and here's how it went:
Shawnie: "high- playing with Dylan in my room"
"Low- Dylan hitting me with a scooter"
Emma "High- getting off my grounding and playing with grace"
"Low- this morning when I was rude to you"
Kiley: "High- having a day with you"
"Low- getting in trouble at dinner"
Dylan: "Bubby and toy story"

Today I learned that my boys love each other and hurt each other. But, its all good because hugs and sorrys were doled out. My girls get in some trouble but at the end of the day they still love and respect me. You see, things aren't always perfect, shining moments of Martha Stewartness but sometimes in the rough moments a tiny little glimmer of love shines the light.

Monday, September 19, 2011

The Magic Big Bed

One of my favorite places in the whole world is my bed. Affectionately deemed "the big bed", it is the place all of our family loves. It is the place we share scary stories, visit other countries and hold impromptu family meetings. it is also the place where tickle torture happens and flying takes place. Pillow fights are a staple and occasionally the big bed takes flight to the family room for a movie night.

The big bed has a history of stories and moments that make our family strongly bonded. When I was a kid I was lucky enough to have my own family big bed. The one place in my crazy house that felt safe, warm and happy. The place that still makes me feel good inside. My parents always welcomed us in their room especially on stormy nights or when bad dreams were afoot. The tradition is carried on in my family.

Right now it is a place where two of my children are snuggled up clamoring for a place next to me. Being in the big bed is kind of like being on my own red carpet. I may not have throngs of adoring fans but when I am buckled into this bed I feel like the queen of the world. Even as I sit and compose this lil ditty, my 2 rascals are talking about their day and giggling. My favorite sound in my favorite place.

The magic big bed is also the place I look forward to falling into at the end of the day and luckily never alone. No matter what happens throughout the day, when I jump into this happy cloud everything is right in the world. It's not much but its my own little piece of heaven. Here's hoping you are somewhere snuggled up with someone you love and who adores you back.... and hopefully it is in your own magic big bed.

Sunday, September 18, 2011

All the Little Things...

What makes up a moms day? It's all the little things. The things that no one sees and takes for granted. It's one of a million little jobs that happen over the course of the day that would be impossible to record. The little things that mean very little to most people.

Waking up early to start the day right, writing a note in a attention deprived child's lunch, calling your mother in law to chat while washing dishes, folding laundry while feeding the baby, singing a lullaby even though you have not put away dinner yet. How about the gosh darn dusting, wiping behind the toilet, making meatloaf from scratch. Cutting the gross chicken fat off or washing/drying lettuce. Wiping off dried toothpaste from the sink, picking up another nasty sock, grocery shopping with a 2 year old, reading that horrible sponge bob book for the 19th time. Wiping a runny nose while changing a diaper, remembering to pay the school 5 more bucks, going to the doctor with a sick child.

All these asinine minute details that make a house and family run smoothly. So many nitty, gritty nasty jobs.

But, you also have all the other little things. Things that make you try harder to be better. The moments that give you motivation and inspiration. The little things that keep you coming back for more.

A good morning snuggle, the little hand that rubs your face, the out of nowhere hug, the "I love you's" that become the soundtrack to your life. The laughter and smiles meant only for you, the shared glance following a moment of success. Prayers at bedtime, the moment right before they fall asleep and give you a smile, finding your tween sucking their thumb, smelling their smell. The successful outings, the handmade cards and trinkets, the love notes that say everything you ever wanted to read. Dinner talks, scary stories that lead to big hugs, sharing secrets and having dates, holding hands even for just a moment. The wet kisses of toddlers and the quick smooches from older ones. The memories they share of good times...the remember when's, the follow the car games, swinging on a swing with a child in your lap. Wishing on a star, finding the moon, waiting for Santa, after bath time where the smell of their hair can bring a tear to your eye. Quiet times where you look out and see your life... and, its all you ever wanted or needed.

These are the moments that matter. Sure, the other things are annoying, disgusting and no one in their right mind would do without prodding. At the end of the day when you drop down to catch your breath... those are the things that are forgotten but the real moments of pleasure are the ones you say a prayer of thanksgiving for. That's what living is all about.

Saturday, September 17, 2011

Reasons to Bliggety Blog

So, I have decided to begin a blog. I don't really know what I am doing. But, I know I want to share my thoughts and put it in writing. Most of my entries will be about being a mom and the many blessings and pitfalls that come with the territory. Who knows? Maybe one day my children will even show some interest and give it a read.

I want to be honest in my writing and so, there will probably be moments of extreme failure and defeat. I will also get on my high horse... for those of you that don't know me well, the higher the horse the more comfortable I am. And, of course you can expect me to talk about my kids.

My kids. The joy of my life. The reason I wake up with a smile every morning. As you will come to know, my children are the most adorable, intelligent and amazing children on the planet. This comes woth the territory of being a parent... your children are the only children ever to be divine beings. You can expect no different from this mom.

Last, but not least, my husband will make an appearance or two. He can be a very funny guy. He gives me great material and without whom I could not be where I am.

This is my start. My introduction. My personal writing exercise. As a reader I only ask for you to add your own thoughts, ideas, opinions or stories. Who knows? This little journey may end up being a mini therapy session. Or maybe, a place to be creative and hopeful. I love looking into peoples everyday moments that make them who they are. These are what life is made of and most often taken for granted. In honor of that, enjoy my moments. My little windows of enlighten.