Thursday, December 13, 2012

Why I am Obsessed With My Birthday...

Those who know me, know that every year approximately 3 months before my birthday, I begin an obnoxious countdown.  I like to think it is cute and sweet.  To some it is an annoying nuisance.  But either way you look at it, it is still an annual birthday tradition.  And now, I am gonna break it down for you...

If you are a mother you are gonna get this.  As a mom I suffer from guiltitis.  This is a raging epidemic that is rarely talked about.  It is highly contagious, has very bad symptoms and is not cured by any current drug on the market.  It is a plague that never leaves you.  You carry it with you all the time.  The heaviness literally weighs you down.

Guiltitis affects you most when you do anything for yourself.  Go to the bathroom and lock the door....guiltitus.  Make a call to a friend just to chat before kids are in bed...guiltitis.  Watch Teen Mom instead of painting with your kids while listening to classical music...guiltitis.  Come home an hour early to fold some laundry in peace...guiltitis.  Read a book and have the last bowl of ice cream...guiltitis.  This just skims the surface.  This doesn't even touch the times you get a new shirt for yourself, drop off the kids at a sitter for an hour, work, sleep, eat, breath...every mommy moment filled with guilt.

The befriending list of nagging questions...did I hug my kids enough today?  Was I patient enough?  Did I actively participate with my kids?  Did I ask another day, kiss them, tell them 5 good things about themselves?  Today did I make each one of them feel special, loved and perfect in every way?

My birthday is one of the only days I give myself a day off from guilitis.  For one day I am the queen of everything.  I do what I want, for as long as I want.  I don't pressure myself to be the perfect mom or wife.  I give myself permission to be free of any roles whatsoever.  I let myself relax fully.  I wear pajamas and drink Starbucks.  I watch reality TV until my brain explodes from sheet stupidity.  I read trash mags to my hearts content.  For one day I give myself a get out of jail free card.  And, for the next 364 days I count down until the next guilt free day.

Let me tell you it is a glorious way to spend your birthday.  Some think it is cute and sweet.  Some find it beyond annoying.  I find it a necessary reminder that life is too short not to live it up, guilt free and celebrating another beautifully blessed year!

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